As we go into the holiday season, may I begin by wishing you all a Happy Thanksgiving. Whatever your family traditions, may this be the season of much happiness for all.  If you are passing along these family traditions, or making new ones for your new family, here are a few tips for making it a nice day for all.  These tips work for any and all get togethers.

1. Don’t over do it.  Keep it simple for yourself and your family.  You want your children to be able to look back on these times as happy times.  And, you want to be able to look back on them and remember them.  If you are doing too much, if you are too stressed out, what is the point?  You won’t remember them at all and your family will just remember that mom/dad/grandma was all stressed out and it was tense.  One way to make it easier for yourself is to delegate some of the “work load” onto others.  This actually turns out very well.  People like to feel needed, so let them do something for you and they will feel part of the celebration.  This may mean that that your sister-in-law brings part of the dinner.  Let her tell you what she would like to bring, or ask her to bring something that you liked that she made before. Ask your favorite auntie to bring that old family recipe, even if only two people still enjoy it.
2. Maybe the children could have a little “art center” and make the centerpiece? Have the art center in the garage or some other out of the way area so the mess does not bother you and you or the children can easily clean it up later.  Have some construction paper, scissors, glue, and some “holiday” stuff at the art center and see what they come up with.  Maybe they could make place cards for all?  Have a digital camera ready and they can take a picture of each person as they arrive and if they are too young, have an adult help them print the picture from the computer and use it in the place card.  They could put stickers around the edge of the photo on the construction paper.  Then, once the table is set (you could do this way ahead of time if you want), the children can randomly put the place cards on the table.  It may add a new dimension to the conversation around the table!
3. I know it is a long held tradition to have a “children’s table”, but one year we ran out of room at the adult table and two adults had to sit at the children’s table and it looked to me like they were having all of the fun and I have never had a “child’s table” since.  Include the children around the table.  It will teach them how to behave in adult conversations at the table, and it will keep the adults in stitches (If your children are anything like the children at our table – which I am sure they are!)
4. Start a family tradition of a game after dinner.  Dominoes?  A card game?  Spoons? (our favorite).  That way everyone sits at the table a little longer and enjoys each other’s company.
5. Get a couple of helpers for the clearing of the table and doing the dishes.  Again, people like to help.  It makes them feel like they belong.  Maybe your nephew brought his new girlfriend?  Ask them both to help.  It is a good “ice breaker”
6. Last but not least, find a little time to be thankful for something this year.  No matter what you celebrate, it will make you feel good to find something or someone to be thankful for.  If it is a person, let them know.  Write them a little note, or do something nice for them.  It will make you feel good too!

HAPPY SEASON OF JOY TO ALL!